Soul Connection, Twin Soul or Relationship ?

The most vital thing to understand about soul connections ( and often the least understood thing about soul connections ) is that they obey totally different rules and work in very different ways to conventional relationships.

In fact in though all we may be thinking about is the actual relationship – its just one element of something much bigger.

Understanding some of these differences is VITAL to getting a grip on the often seemingly bizarre situations we find ourselves in when connected to someone. In a conventional relationship person A meets person B, there’s usually some physical attraction, then getting to know the person, then emotions begin to develop. A 3 stage process…

In soul connections they can start in the same way with stages 1 and 2 but then WHAM the emotions come from nowhere and they are HUGE, usually massively disproportionate from the time we’ve spent together or how much we think we know the person. It’s also very common that the emotions come first sometimes when we haven’t even met the person face to face. Or the very first time we meet them the connection happens and we realize we do know them and somehow the emotions are there already.

So the crucial aspect to realize here is that its an EXTERNAL force between us and them not internal as in a conventional relationship….. Do we love them and them us, yes but its not a love that’s something we ‘decide’, its been decided for us by the connection and was spiritually pre existing, all we had to do was meet them in order to be brought to recognize that.

Both people will respond, usually instantly knowing there’s something special but how much they are affected at the time and how much they realize whats going on depends upon their level of spiritual openness at the time. We’re all familiar with the situation where its fine for a time then one person just seems to freak out and head for the hills because its all so strong and they don’t feel in control of it. A classic case where the closer they get to it the more there’s still there and they fear the lack of control they would have in the interaction.

So remember, this is an external force and its strong. To those of us who are open that’s a wonderful thing. To those who still have fear insecurity and doubt it can also be a terrifying thing – something that’s so powerful they begin to fear it because they have no escape route and no control. So when you have your readings and 10 readers say no he doesn’t love you and 10 say yes he does, then you join a huge group of people who have experienced the “what the heck is going on in this situation and what’s the reality ?”

Well if you’re in a true connection, the reality is yes the love is there, but it’s a love that is not a conventional ’emotionally decided’ love, its something that transcends that. You love each others soul in a pure spiritual way and that has existed before you even met. The thing to really understand is that although the other person may SEEM to have their freewill overriding this, often its pure fear. Also if they are still spiritually closed they aren’t yet feeling the full force of the connection so the truth may be that yes they feel it but that they haven’t opened enough yet to let it consume them and they’re fighting it.

Have faith that spiritual openness is the order of the day, its often why there’s a connection, to make the spiritually closed people walk the path of total openness. And when they get there, then the connection will control them as much as it controls you. Don’t be under the illusion that they can somehow choose never to be open or they have enough will power to override it. True connections are mutual and as the runner opens up they will be more affected by it. Free will can not maintain control over these things forever, its simply not powerful enough. And besides, this is why you were given the connection in the first place, to bring you both to new levels of spiritual openness and awareness.

I believe it was Einstein who said “the only thing that’s constant in the universe is change’ People cant choose not to change its how the universe works, they can just delay the process. They cannot use free will to stand still forever. Its why over the years I have thousands of letters from people, all of who have experienced this phenomenon and have been through the hell that often accompanies it. People reunite after incredible amounts of time and the love is still as strong, it never goes. Its just that it took so long for one of the partners to let go enough to accept it.

A classic case I often site is a client who met her soul connection when she was 18 and knew there was something there but chose to not go with it. Now in her 40’s she called me in tremendous pain to say she cant live without this guy. He just cant get his head around how she could stay away for over 20 years and then be in so much pain to be with him. But this story isnt unusual….when people open up it gets to them, they cant fight it anymore. My files are full of cases where people come together across continents, over incredible periods of time. Remember there’s no guarantee of a relationship, thats down to the two of you when you have balanced all those energies and worked through all that karma.. that’s when the universe’s process is finished and it’s over to your freewill.

So when you have a reading try not to make any judgments on what he or she is feeling right now, because that’s really not the whole story and most often wont be any sort of guidance whatsoever. Get a reading on the karma, the purpose of the connection, the path and the progression – and what your personal lessons are, that’s going to give you the right answers. Above all have faith in the universes process and find out what you are meant to learn from it.

Your job is to progress on the individual journey of your soul.. Once you do then the craziness will subside and you will find peace and acceptance from the oneness, you will be able to love the other person without NEEDING the other person.. It’s not meant to stay crazy or painful its meant to make you see to go on your inner journey.. and then achieve the state of unconditional love where you can love someone with no need, no pain and no expectations – the highest order..

Above all don’t feel there’s nothing you can do, and don’t just wait…your happiness is your gift to claim and that needs nobody else.. the connection is pushing you further down that road even though it many not seem like it sometimes.

For a consultation via phone or Skype audio please email me at or add me on facebook

Please consider reading my articles on ego death, energy work and spiritual progression…these will help you most

Check out my other site


New Audiobook launched February 12th 2014

twin soul, soulmate, soul connection book, steve gunn


Recommended Reading

FAQ about my work

Soul Connections – Untangling the confusion


Case Studies

Maria’s Soul Connection

Katie’s Soul Connection

Joni’s Soul Shock

Julie’s Journal Addiction

Lose the Concepts to find peace

Sam’s Story

Katie’s Soul Connection Transformation

Emily – Spiritual Addiction


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  1. Speaking with a friend she mentioned soul connections to me and I looked the term up. This being my first time hearing it or atleast remembering. Everything written here is describing what I have just recently gone through and still am. Telling myself I just don’t understand. Only able to describe what’s happening in my life as bizarre and I do not use that word often. He is a runner and not only did he run but got a gf within a week. I was devastated and couldn’t understand all the excuses he was making and then that. Now Im learning about myself…about him..about unconditional love..the love I have for him.
    Due to our circumstances our lives are intertwined for some time. I’ll be waiting patiently for him to open up but also I can finally breath now that I have some understanding and live. Just knowing our souls decided to connect before this journey is enough to keep me going for myself and allowing him to live his journey. Jazmin your story is so common to mine. I pray you both found your happiness! Thank you!

  2. A deep thank you. It makes sense and it helps a great deal. Even though I am psychic I have had such difficulty making sense of this situation. All good things to you.

  3. I have been looking for a reading as this that would explain the difference b/w a relationship and soul connection. Thank you so much! I have also gone to many readers. They all described my runner very accurately, what he is going through, the way he feels about me, and every reader agreed their was a soul connection. The most common reason for the connection was that he could sense that I was a healer and that is why he was avoiding me or running away from me. That he would come to me only when he is vulnerable and wants to drain me. These healers said that there is someone else out there that is coming in my life that can love me as much as I will love them.
    This information still did not allow me to understand why I feel such a strong pull to him although I hear from him once a month or less. And it’s been going on for over a year.
    Only one reader referred to him as a soulmate runner. That was the first time I heard of the term. She gave me your name. Since then I have been reading articles like crazy and can’t believe what I thought was just a mad and foolish obsession that I could not move on from actually has a purpose in my life. This allows me to accept it for that and move on with my life until otherwise…Thanks again and any feedback/advice would be greatly appreciated!

  4. It’s amazing how you stumble upon things exactly when you need to, when you have an open mind. This brought tears to my eyes – really hit home right now. I’m finding myself in a situation I never imagined, one that is terrifying and totally exciting at the same time, and I feel like it’s all “right” even though I don’t understand it at all. Thanks for the validation.

  5. Thank you for your comments. Just a little warning about diagnosing your own situation from an article, its very dangerous as the articles are general and so really use only as very general guidance. Only a detailed reading can give you the ins and outs of your situation. I mean a proper reading not fortune that shows you where your power is not that its in someone else. But that part in your comments about living is exactly what will help you most…Good luck and hope you really enjoy it and the spells are behind you

  6. I wish i would have read this before i spent crazy money on love spells and readings. This was exactly what I needed to read. I now know why the love spells wouldn’t work. I guess soul connections have far greater energies at work. In my case, he is the runner and I am the one going through the hell. Well gone through the hell, I am now beginning to open up to whatever lesson meeting my soul connection intended to teach me. Its so crazy, trying to explain to your friends why after only knowing a person for a short amount of time,you have such great emotions and LOVE for them. Not just any love, unconditional love. Love that may very well come directly from SOURCE. And then having been told by your friends that you are crazy for feeling like that over a person you barely even know. Unexplainable. Not to mention coming to a place when that person has run off due to fear, and you not knowing if they feel the same way or not. You’re just left wondering day in and day out do they feel the say way and are they ever going to come back. Now I know why his words and actions haven’t added up. He’s having a hard time trying to explain to himself what is happening, why he loves me so much in such a short amount of time. He’s scared so he’s trying to fight off the idea but he can’t lie to me and deny those feelings. Thank you Steve, for this article. Of course I don’t know how long it’ll take him to finally fold under and accept the love and the connection, but I know what I am going to do during that time; live.

  7. Thank you Kate but these articles aren’t my work, they are simply context setters to my work which is and always has been working with people on specifics as opposed to applying articles which are general ..I appreciate you taking the time to comment – Regards Steve

  8. I’ve read several of your articles Steve, and every one gives me further insight and clarification, but this one was particularly helpful. Thank you for doing what you do. Your work is very much appreciated. 🙂

  9. Thank you! Just found your site today, and your articles are helping me so much! The one about old souls was amazing. Thank you so much for taking all the trouble and time to write these wonderful articles and upload them for free! Blessed be! 🙂

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